Andrea my love, my wife, my other self, marrying you was the only good decision I ever made. There are so many things I want to tell you today but I feel that there is nothing I say that you listen to. We used to talk and hear each other and make decisions that were best for both of us but now it seems the more I talk the less you hear.
I know you have said that you have spent the last two years trying to make our relationship work but you are wrong. It takes two to make love work and you were working alone. The way that I see it you spent the last two years preparing yourself to leave instead of helping us to stay. When did you ever say to me, "We should see a counselor" or "I am at my end you need to change now" or even "Help me"??? I hear you say "I have to figure things out." I know that I could have been more proactive but in my way I was doing my best to help us out.
I know that you think you are doing your best to be the best person you can be and the best mother you can be. You are wrong as well. The best person we can be is together and the best parents we can be is together. You are not giving that a chance and you are throwing our family away so that you can take the easy way out.
No doubt that you have heard so many people tell you "I just want you to be happy," people who don't really want to get involved and stay neutral will tell you this. "If it's just not there then it's best you move on" That is a lie also, If it's not there we can find where it is together. The people in your life who are telling you to just be happy are only telling you what you want to hear, not what you need to hear. Nobody wants to get their hands dirty so nobody wants to ask you the hard questions because they are consoling you. What they should be saying is did you try everything? did you ask him to see counseling with you, did you ask him for help.
If you answered honestly you would say no, and as soon ask I knew your dire feelings I offered to do these things right away. The first step in trying to fix a relationship is to seek help together as a couple. You went by this and just gave up. Perhaps because you felt that I wouldn't respond to it, perhaps because you just wanted to leave and never look back.
You have talked about the best interests of our children and our family. The best interests of our family is to stay as a family, you won't even try. One day you will have to tell Parker and Paige that our family wasn't even worth trying for. That staying together wasn't something you even wanted to attempt.
Your love is not something that I can live without, without half my soul, without the best part of me. I can never be happy without you in my life. The thought of getting over you and living happily without you is even worse. I am down to my last threads and I need you to make me whole again. I hope that you can see some truth in my words and see hope for us in the future. I hope that you see it before it is too late, I am so close to falling and I will never get up. Please help me Andrea.
I love you.
No comments:
Post a Comment